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Thrifting!

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So recently I have found a new treasure thrifting. I haven’t always been so excited about thrifting. (Mom if your reading this I’m sorry for giving you such a hard time growing up about second hand stuff.) I was terrible, I was embarrassed and didn’t even want to go to a thrift store or even garage sales. I was so ridiculous! But I grew up. And the economy is terrible and I hate paying the full amount for anything so second hand is great. Anyways I was on the Book of Face and a Mama friend shared a link/picture about the Memorial Day sale at Salvation Army, 50% off everything! How could I pass this up? I had to go out even though I only had $40 in my wallet for next two weeks. Well I couldn’t! So while Hubby and Little man had their friends over to play my MIL and I went out on our quest. I was actually in search of end tables for our living room. I want to purchase a set of end tables, a two sofa tables and repurpose them. Well we got to our first S.A and we found tables but I wasn’t in love, they had too much detail. But they were only $39.99 for the pair and with 50% off they were only $20 for the two. Such a great deal but after staring an inspecting them for a while we decide no. So on we went to the next S.A about 6 miles away. I looked at the large furniture selection and found nothing. So on I went to the rest of the store and found nothing. And then it caught my eye, this old appliance sitting on the shelf so lonely.. Could it be? Did I really just stumble upon the thing I have been wanting for years? It really was, I found a juicer :)

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It has all the pieces? How did I find this? Will it work? Should I get it? Can I clean it? I carried it around the store for about 5 minutes while asking myself all these questions. The tag read $15. Then I started thinking how could I not buy it, this is what I have wanted for so long. So over to the outlet for the moment of truth I went. Please work, please work, please work! And it did!! Off I went to the counter with my large dorky smile on my face, and I paid the cashier $7.49 for my Juicer. I was so excited. It has been a week and I still haven’t cleaned it up and used it but I plan on testing it out this week. If anyone has any tasty recipes let share them please :)

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Mother’s Day

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With Mother’s Day behind us I can’t seem to get out of my head how much I don’t care for the day… Yeah that’s right, I don’t like Mother’s Day! it’s a commercially inflated day that is emotionally draining for most, And someone is bound to get hurt. Okay so your thinking “how is someone going to get hurt, what is this crazy lady talking about? This is a day to express to your mother how awesome she is and how much you love her!” Well let me explain.
First: Everyone has a mother, Mother’s have mothers and their mothers have mothers. How are you to please everyone. Spend the day together and have a big dinner!?! -WRONG- How are you going to get Grandma, Mom, the daughter who now has a family, and the son that also has a family and his wife is now a mother and she has a mother and the son in law has a mother, and his mother has a mother, not to mention the son in law and daughter in law have siblings as well. Someone is going to feel left out. How do you please all of those woman? You can’t! You can try to schedule breakfast with one, lunch with the other and dinner with majority.. but then someone is left doing all the running around and their mother’s day is spent on the go with cranky children not doing anything fun and again someone is miserable! How do you picture Mother’s Day? Waking up to a clean house? Getting to sleep in? Breakfast in bed? A day at the Spa? What about seeing your mother? Does that even cross your mind? I know as a young mother taking care of a house and a young family I would like all of the above on any given day. But I am going to go out on a whim here and say that a mother of grown children and grandchildren would like nothing other than all of their children and grandchildren in the same room. How does this work!?! In my opinion it doesn’t.

Second: This day is also a hard day for all of the bereaved mothers out there, and this is a lot of mothers. Mother’s Day is a day you spend with your children, they make you cards and gifts and you are thankful for them and they are thankful for you. Well, on this day a mother can’t help but feel the loss of their baby. That the baby isn’t here to make a card with hand prints and smeared paint, too much glitter and no words.. Weather the baby passed away as a miscarriage, stillbirth, infant death, an adolescent or an adult, it is still the loss of a child. A mothers love for a child starts usually pre conception but definitely when those two lines appear on that tiny magical stick. And that love never every weakens or goes away, it just strengthens as the hours, days, and years go on. Mother’s Day is torture for these woman. Not to mention the ones who have lost a baby and don’t have any other children. Does anyone call them to wish them a Happy Mother’s Day? Or send then a card in the mail? Or write on their wall? Do people even recognize them as a mother if there is no physical child with them all the time? This has got to be agonizingly painful! = (

Third: Mother’s Day was founded over a hundred years ago by Anna Jarvis in honor of her Mother also Anna Jarvis. She worked hard for years to get a holiday to celebrate mothers and all of their devotion and love for their families. Only a few years after the day was proclaimed a holiday it started to become commercialized and Anna protested the day and tried to get rid of it. The day was founded with different intentions and became a day for Hallmark, florists and cheap candy.
Mother’s Day is not what it was intended to be and I do not care for the day at all!

With that being said I did have a nice day on Sunday/Mother’s Day this year. I cried for hours after waking with grief at the loss of my baby boy, but after composing myself it was a good day. We got ready for breakfast with my family, my mother, my mother-in-law, my father, and my brother-in-law. After breakfast my husband, son and I went to the museum where Mother’s got in free only with the admission of a child’s ticket (so it doesn’t really honor all mothers, does it?) and then for a late lunch early dinner at Panera Bread. This was not uncommon from a typical Sunday except the card my husband got me and the gift card to Starbucks my mother got me.

I just don’t understand the day.. Seem pointless and commercialized to me!

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Figured out a theme..

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I am so excited about Leonidas’ 4th Birthday! After saying I picked a theme about 3 times I finally did pick a theme! :) We are doing an Up Party inspired by the Disney movie. I have been goggling and pinning away for the last few day and I think I have some really good ideas floating around in my head.. hahaha, get it? “Floating” Okay sorry its 3am and I would probably think anything is funny at this point.

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His birthday is in September but parties are a lot of work and the cost is always so inflated. hehe.. inflated, okay I’ll stop.
I like to get a head start, DIY as much as possible and search for sales. I also have a small problem with not asking for help, not letting anyone do anything and making all the decorations, food and cake myself. Not to mention setting everything out myself too. Well this year I will make an effort to take and ask for as much help as I need. Can’t wait to see if I stick to my word..

Keep an eye out for DIY birthday party posts.. soon to come :)

tears..

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I have been struggling the last few days; not feeling depressed but just short, inpatient, out of it, not sleeping and just feeling off. I didn’t realize I needed a good cry until now, 10pm Friday night. (tears) I miss my baby boy and I think it is really taking a toll on me emotionally and now physically… I have been running on empty for a few weeks and not addressing my need to just cry and let it all out. So here it goes!

I know that I am so fortunate to have Leonidas but I miss Jaimison sooo much. It hurts so much. It’s hard going places, I feel the void everywhere we go. I feel my arms are empty.. (tears)

We went to a theme park last week and I just couldn’t shake the empty arms feeling. That I should be wearing him, missing out on roller coasters, and stopping on a bench to feed him. :(

I really wish that a trip to the grocery store was a different kind of challenge, trying to juggle two boys, entertain a toddler and feed an infant all while filling the cart with health groceries. Instead I find myself avoiding the store until we’re down to nothing and purchasing comfort food which includes things that aren’t on my list.

And when I go to Target I should be buying too many baby outfits that he would grow out of in a few weeks and buying the boys corresponding outfits for holidays and pictures and just because they are cute. But instead I find myself buying Leonidas too many toys, things for the house that aren’t necessary and sometimes clothes for myself. Which turns into me feeling bad about me. Not only do my clothes at home not fit me but neither do the ones I want to buy at the store. I keeping trying to remind myself “you just has a baby!” And the fact that I’m sad doesn’t help the weight issue.

I am going to the gym but it’s so hard.. Hard to get up and go and push myself. I’m already working so hard everyday to get up an go, and to push myself to diet and work out is tough. I have barely enough energy as it is. I am so drained. But I need to get in shape so I can feel good about myself.

It’s been hard to get a good nights sleep lately and that should be because of the every 2 hour feedings not because I’ve had a bad day emotionally… I don’t remember having a hard time sleeping, it’s always so easy for me. Now I just lay in bed till 12, 1, 2 in the morning not able to sleep :/ This is really getting harder as the months go on… (tears)

Today Mike bought me a little point and shoot for our anniversary and I can’t help but cry thinking of all the pictures and moments I’m missing out on. (tears) I should have 100’s of photos of him already, but instead I have a handful that not everyone is comfortable seeing. Ones I can’t post on my timeline or hang on my living room wall. I wish I was holding him right now instead of sobbing over this post. (tears)

Sometimes I have to push myself to do the simple things. Like take a picture of Leo being silly everyday or just doing nothing else but holding him and giving him 100’s of extra kisses for absolutely no reasons. I make sure we do something fun everyday and that my mood doesn’t interfere with how I react to him and his actions.

Leo spent the afternoon with his Grammy the other day because I knew I had no patience the moment I woke up. So instead of us battling all day he went to play with her and I came home and did some much needed organizing. Nothing like organizing to change your mood. It really bothered me that this was something that needed to be done, that I knew I would be short and a grumpopotamus. (tears)

It kills me to see Mommies not holding there babies everywhere and always, not preventing there cries but ignoring them, taking all of those moments for granted and not appreciating it. Not realizing that life is an amazing gift an nothing to waste or be taken for granted. (tears)

We are going out for our anniversary tomorrow night and I can’t help but think that we would be spending this time differently, a quiet night at home with our family holding and cuddling Leonidas and our new baby… (tears)

This is the hardest thing I have ever gone through and I really hope there isn’t something more challenging in my future. (tears)

I love & miss you Jaimison!

(tears)

Leonidas’ Valentines Day Potluck Party!

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Monday February 13th 2012 Leonidas was invited to a Valentines Day Potluck Party at a local park. We made homemade Valentines Day cards, and I took on the task of Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches and Oatmeal cookies.

Leonidas and I had lots of fun with the Valentines day cards. I cut out all the shapes on my Cricut, and I helped Leonidas glue them all together. They turned out so cute.

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We made the sandwiches on honey wheat Natures Own bread, JIF all natural peanut butter and Welches natural grape jelly (all HFCS free :)) and used a mini heart shaped cookie cutter and I helped Leo cut them out. There was no waist we gave the scraps to the dogs, they love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches :)

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I made my regular recipe of Oatmeal cookies and turned some of the raw dough on to parchment paper and cut the cookies out with the mini heart shaped cookie cutter. It was super simple and didn’t take that much longer than scoping balls out for regular shaped cookies :)

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Family sleeping :)

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Co-sleeping or what I like to call it ‘Family Sleeping’ does not have to be taboo, I doesn’t have to be crowded, and it most certainly doesn’t have to be ugly :) Our son is three years old and sleeps in our king size family bed, when we found out we were expecting baby number two I was trying to think of how to make our family bed work for all of us. None of us were ready for Leo to sleep in his own bed and definitely not his own room. We asked Leo if he wanted to sleep on the other side of daddy (we have a platform bed and it is 13 inches off the ground) so baby could sleep in the middle and he wasn’t happy with that idea either. After lots of thinking and researching I came across Peaceful Parenting’s blog post about co-sleeping and decided that a side car co-sleeper with Leonidas’ old crib would be perfect for baby number two. I would be able to breastfeed him during the night and slide him safely into his own space.

My husband had to move the room around a little to make the bed and crib fit along one wall since we have a small room, but he made it work. He moved the bed and assembled the crib next to it, he then lowered the crib mattress to the lowest setting (since our bed is so low to the ground) and our mattress was lower than the crib mattress so he got to work of removing our mattress and the slats and raising the mattress.

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While re assembling the bed and slats the mattress (that was propped against the wall) fell on him.. hahaha. I know I’m so mean for laughing and posting the picture, but he wasn’t hurt and it was funny.

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After he got the evil mattress back on the bed it lined up perfect with the crib mattress. Our bed is on a rug and extremely heavy and low to the ground so it doesn’t move, we pushed the crib and bed against the wall and it didn’t budge. Some people use tie straps to attach the beds or bungee cords to secure it. He then pushed the crib mattress up against our bed mattress and rest it on the lip of our platform bed. The is a rather large gap on the far side of the crib but that is normal when side car-ing a crib. There are many ways to fill this gap safely. You want to make sure you use something firm enough that the baby will not suffocate or get stuck in the gap and something soft enough that the baby will not be injured. High density foam is what I wanted to use but it was kind of expensive, I waited for it to go on sale at a local craft store but it didn’t. I wanted to finish the bed before baby arrived and decided to use a twin size egg crate foam mattress pad from joann’s with a 40% off coupon. The gap in the crib was 6″ wide 6″ deep and 51″ long. I measured long ways 51″ and cut the access off, I then rolled the foam and tucked it in the gap nice and tight. It fit perfect and nothing moved :)

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The crafter inside of me couldn’t stand putting a sheet on the mattress and then cover the foam with pillow cases or blankets, so I came up with a solution. I decided to take one of our sheets (they all match) and make a custom crib sheet that would fit over the mattress and the padding. So I started googling for a tutorial on how to make a crib sheet. I found one and got to work. :) The first thing I did was take all of the elastic out of the king size sheet (I recommend not being impatient and finding or purchasing a seam ripper if you ever need to remove stitches) so that I could re purpose as much as possible. The tutorial I found was measurements for a regular size crib sheet so I had to do some math, and added the 6″ gap to the width of the sheet pattern and tried to follow the directions the best I could. (I am so bad about following directions) The sheet came out great and fit on the mattress and padding perfect. Making a matching custom sized crib sheet was a success. But that wasn’t enough for me.. It looked to plain and didn’t add anything to the room so I came up with another idea. Matching decorative crib bumpers. I had Leonidas’ bumper set still so I decided to remove all of the fabric and recover them using my king size pillow shams. I also had to take all the stitches out of the pillow shams so that I didn’t waist any fabric. The bumpers that I had were for a full crib so they were to long for the partial crib I had. I measured the three side and cut the bumpers to the appropriate length. I then measured all the pieces of the pillow shams and pinned it all. I used the excess pieces and made ties to secure it to the crib sides and started sewing it all together to fit the bumper padding. When it was done I sewed three vertical lines in the bumpers so that it would fold in each of the corners and one in the center. This helped it fit tighter to the crib sides.

20120112-225053.jpgThis is what the finished project looked like. (Don’t mind Leo sleeping in the picture) I was very happy with the outcome :)

If you would like some information on the benefits of co-sleeping, here is a link to Peaceful Parenting’s ‘Baby Sleep Resource Page’ that I found helpful. She has a large list of articles, books, and subscriptions about the subject.

Happy Family Sleeping :)

Homemade Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Granola Bars

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My husband and three year old son love granola bars, and I have been searching for a granola bar that they could both eat. I couldn’t find one in the store that didn’t have high fructose corn syrup, were low in sugar and were still delicious and filling enough for my husband. I decided to try my hand at making homemade ones. I came up with this recipe and it is a big hit.

Ingredients:

4 Tablespoons of butter Coconut Oil

1/4 Cup of Raw Honey

3 Tablespoons of Peanut Butter

1/8 Cup of packed light brown Sugar

2 Cups of Chocolate Delight Granola (Bake to Nature)

1 Cup of Rice Cereal (Rice Crispies)

Handful of mini chocolate chips

Directions:

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In small sauce pan melt butter than add honey and peanut butter.

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Remove butter, honey and peanut butter from heat and add sugar; mix well.

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Measure out granola and rice cereal in bowl and fold butter and sugar mixture in. Mix until all the granola and cereal are covered.

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Spread granola mixture evenly into parchment paper lined 9×9 pan and add chocolate chips on top.

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Let sit for 20-30 minutes and then turn granola out onto cutting board. Cut in half on way and then cut into granola bars. I got 14 out of my 9×9 pan.

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I then wrapped each granola in parchment paper and refrigerated over night.

This recipe filled me up for breakfast and would make an awesome afternoon smack. :) If you try the recipe out let me know what you think.

Thanks for reading!